A Man Walking His Dog
December 17, 2001 4:05 P.M.
I'm sorry to bother you twice in one day, but I hit the send key too quickly. Right after writing to you about escalators I went to visit the new Toys 'R Us in Times Square. On my way I passed a man walking a dog. The man was dressed as Uncle Sam. The dog was wearing a cardboard Uncle Sam hat. Riding on the dog's back was a cat, which was wearing a red, white and blue knit cap. Riding on the cat's back were two white mice. I didn't see any clothing on the mice.
Yes, they were all live animals. Yes, they were all behaving themselves.
The 60 foot tall Ferris wheel in the Toy's 'R Us ain't got nothing on what is happening outside the store.
And the store didn't have what I was looking for. Don't worry Elizabeth. I'll keep looking.
Monday, December 17, 2001
Escalators
Escalators
December 17, 2001 2:40 P.M.
There is an unnatural fascination with escalators in this town. Everywhere you go in The Big City you will find either an escalator or a revolving door or both. It is almost as if residents of The Big City can't be trusted to walk up a flight of stairs.
I have noticed there are several types of escalators in The Big City. The most common type is the "double wide". On this device there are rules. For example, if you are going to stand still for the ride you must stand on the right hand side of the step. This allows the Type A personalities to walk past you on the left side. This works most of the time because most people know the rule. The rule is not actually posted anywhere. If you don't know the rule someone coming up behind you will be happy to explain it in one or two words.
Couples who are currently dating and are still hanging all over each other often ignore the rule. They insist on holding hands up the escalator. No amount of prompting from the rear can separate these lovebirds.
The system also doesn't work well when there is someone on the escalator who exceeds the device's "normal" design. But enough about me and my big butt.
Another type of escalator is the "single wide". On this device you can only fit one person per step. Unless the entire column of people chooses to walk the escalator everyone is stuck in the position they took when they boarded. Frankly, this shouldn't be a big problem as the trip is usually about 30 seconds or less. Here in The Big City though they have installed "single wides" going to all of the commuter bus gates in the Port Authority Bus Terminal (PABT). Many commuters have timed out their trip home to the second. If they arrive at the escalator to their gate and have found it is not moving quickly they could miss their bus.
Waiting a half-hour at the PABT for the next bus shouldn't be traumatic except for two points. There is no place comfortable to sit at the PABT (by design, to discourage loitering) and if you need a bathroom you will find the homeless have camped out in the stalls at the PABT. At least they have in the men's room. I can't speak to what is happening in the ladies room.
Another type of escalator is the type found in Macy's, at 34th St. and Broadway. These are the escalators installed before development of sheet metal. They are wooden escalators and can be found all over the store. I once went to Macy's and took the escalators to the seventh floor. These antique escalators are actual tourist destinations. At this point they are likely protected historic sites and as such cannot be removed.
They have installed escalators in many of the subway stations. If you once owned an ant farm and was fascinated at watching the ants then watching commuters bottleneck onto the subway escalators is for you.
I was descending an escalator this morning when a co-worker tried to get my attention, just to say hello. I didn't notice. When on the escalator I get the "thousand mile stare". While I like to think I'm maintaining my hickness, I am slowing become just another one of the pod people. I never really thought it was possible to sleep standing up with my eyes open but here I am.
I hope Christmas brings you joy.
December 17, 2001 2:40 P.M.
There is an unnatural fascination with escalators in this town. Everywhere you go in The Big City you will find either an escalator or a revolving door or both. It is almost as if residents of The Big City can't be trusted to walk up a flight of stairs.
I have noticed there are several types of escalators in The Big City. The most common type is the "double wide". On this device there are rules. For example, if you are going to stand still for the ride you must stand on the right hand side of the step. This allows the Type A personalities to walk past you on the left side. This works most of the time because most people know the rule. The rule is not actually posted anywhere. If you don't know the rule someone coming up behind you will be happy to explain it in one or two words.
Couples who are currently dating and are still hanging all over each other often ignore the rule. They insist on holding hands up the escalator. No amount of prompting from the rear can separate these lovebirds.
The system also doesn't work well when there is someone on the escalator who exceeds the device's "normal" design. But enough about me and my big butt.
Another type of escalator is the "single wide". On this device you can only fit one person per step. Unless the entire column of people chooses to walk the escalator everyone is stuck in the position they took when they boarded. Frankly, this shouldn't be a big problem as the trip is usually about 30 seconds or less. Here in The Big City though they have installed "single wides" going to all of the commuter bus gates in the Port Authority Bus Terminal (PABT). Many commuters have timed out their trip home to the second. If they arrive at the escalator to their gate and have found it is not moving quickly they could miss their bus.
Waiting a half-hour at the PABT for the next bus shouldn't be traumatic except for two points. There is no place comfortable to sit at the PABT (by design, to discourage loitering) and if you need a bathroom you will find the homeless have camped out in the stalls at the PABT. At least they have in the men's room. I can't speak to what is happening in the ladies room.
Another type of escalator is the type found in Macy's, at 34th St. and Broadway. These are the escalators installed before development of sheet metal. They are wooden escalators and can be found all over the store. I once went to Macy's and took the escalators to the seventh floor. These antique escalators are actual tourist destinations. At this point they are likely protected historic sites and as such cannot be removed.
They have installed escalators in many of the subway stations. If you once owned an ant farm and was fascinated at watching the ants then watching commuters bottleneck onto the subway escalators is for you.
I was descending an escalator this morning when a co-worker tried to get my attention, just to say hello. I didn't notice. When on the escalator I get the "thousand mile stare". While I like to think I'm maintaining my hickness, I am slowing become just another one of the pod people. I never really thought it was possible to sleep standing up with my eyes open but here I am.
I hope Christmas brings you joy.
Wednesday, December 05, 2001
A Walk In the Park With Bill
I got a call this past Friday evening from the scheduling coordinator for the Central Park Medical Unit (CPMU). She wanted to know if I was available on Saturday. Sure.
The first call for an ambulance on Saturday was for a woman who had fallen off of her horse. In the 10 years I volunteered as an EMT in Chili, NY, a relatively rural community, I had never gone to a call involving a horse. Now that I'm in The Big City, I get that call.
Actually, it is a regular occurrence in the park. You can rent a horse by the hour and ride it on the "bridal path". This is only one of the many things people are doing in the park. It seems people get hurt doing most of these things. For example, there is roller blading.
It seems that some people purchase roller blades, and then decide to learn how to use them by going down the steepest hill in the park. At the bottom of the hill are a curve and some large rocks. I think you get the picture.
There is also biking. My first bike accident patient had fallen head first off of his bike. When we arrived he was becoming conscience. His first question to me was "how are my teeth?" To which I replied, "Excuse me?” "How are my teeth? I just paid $25,000 to have them capped. Are they ok?” I looked and replied, "Your teeth appear to be fine. Let's talk about the two inch gash on the top of your head.”
He hadn't been wearing a helmet. We carry a brochure to give to bikers and roller bladers regarding wearing a helmet.
The CPMU does not participate in the 911 system. Instead joggers dispatch us. Joggers stop at the ambulance to tell us of someone they passed who is lying on the ground looking injured. It is for this reason we tend to spend the entire day "touring the park" with the ambulance. We spend the day driving around Central Park looking for sick and injured people. Mostly we find people looking for directions.
This past Saturday the most popular place in the park was Strawberry Fields. No strawberries are grown in Strawberry Fields. It is across the street from where John Lennon lived and was shot. A memorial to John Lennon is located there. On this particular Saturday it had become a memorial to George Harrison. Hundreds, if not thousands, of people were visiting to pay their respects. They were gathering in ad hoc groups and singing songs his songs. When we stopped by two groups had formed. One group was singing his Beatles tunes and the other was singing his post-Beatles tunes. Police were nearby in case it got ugly.
There are some stops in Central Park that everyone should make. One is the Bethesda Fountain. On the weekends you will find a fellow wearing only a loincloth and feathers in his hair while playing the violin. I didn't pay a lot of attention to Mr. Riker, my social studies teacher in the seventh grade, when he taught me about the Native Americans but I'm fairly certain the violin was not one of the instruments of these indigenous peoples. We call this fellow Thor. He is there every weekend. We don't know his real name, nor do we care. His musical style can best be described as "insanity".
I'm interested to see what happens when winter finally arrives.
Also at this location on this particular day was a street performer juggling flaming torches while riding a unicycle with a tourist on his shoulders.
Central Park has its own outdoor ice rink. The air temperature on Saturday was around 70. When we stopped by the rink at about 5:00 P.M. there was an incredible line to get into the rink. I don't usually think of ice-skating when it is 70 degrees, but obviously somebody does. To get in to the rink area patrons must pass through a metal detector. Are they looking of Osama? No. It appears they are trying to prevent gang fights.
Gang members ice skate?
I had planned to take a nap on Saturday. Instead, I spent the day in the park. I needed the sleep, but I enjoyed the entertainment even more.
The first call for an ambulance on Saturday was for a woman who had fallen off of her horse. In the 10 years I volunteered as an EMT in Chili, NY, a relatively rural community, I had never gone to a call involving a horse. Now that I'm in The Big City, I get that call.
Actually, it is a regular occurrence in the park. You can rent a horse by the hour and ride it on the "bridal path". This is only one of the many things people are doing in the park. It seems people get hurt doing most of these things. For example, there is roller blading.
It seems that some people purchase roller blades, and then decide to learn how to use them by going down the steepest hill in the park. At the bottom of the hill are a curve and some large rocks. I think you get the picture.
There is also biking. My first bike accident patient had fallen head first off of his bike. When we arrived he was becoming conscience. His first question to me was "how are my teeth?" To which I replied, "Excuse me?” "How are my teeth? I just paid $25,000 to have them capped. Are they ok?” I looked and replied, "Your teeth appear to be fine. Let's talk about the two inch gash on the top of your head.”
He hadn't been wearing a helmet. We carry a brochure to give to bikers and roller bladers regarding wearing a helmet.
The CPMU does not participate in the 911 system. Instead joggers dispatch us. Joggers stop at the ambulance to tell us of someone they passed who is lying on the ground looking injured. It is for this reason we tend to spend the entire day "touring the park" with the ambulance. We spend the day driving around Central Park looking for sick and injured people. Mostly we find people looking for directions.
This past Saturday the most popular place in the park was Strawberry Fields. No strawberries are grown in Strawberry Fields. It is across the street from where John Lennon lived and was shot. A memorial to John Lennon is located there. On this particular Saturday it had become a memorial to George Harrison. Hundreds, if not thousands, of people were visiting to pay their respects. They were gathering in ad hoc groups and singing songs his songs. When we stopped by two groups had formed. One group was singing his Beatles tunes and the other was singing his post-Beatles tunes. Police were nearby in case it got ugly.
There are some stops in Central Park that everyone should make. One is the Bethesda Fountain. On the weekends you will find a fellow wearing only a loincloth and feathers in his hair while playing the violin. I didn't pay a lot of attention to Mr. Riker, my social studies teacher in the seventh grade, when he taught me about the Native Americans but I'm fairly certain the violin was not one of the instruments of these indigenous peoples. We call this fellow Thor. He is there every weekend. We don't know his real name, nor do we care. His musical style can best be described as "insanity".
I'm interested to see what happens when winter finally arrives.
Also at this location on this particular day was a street performer juggling flaming torches while riding a unicycle with a tourist on his shoulders.
Central Park has its own outdoor ice rink. The air temperature on Saturday was around 70. When we stopped by the rink at about 5:00 P.M. there was an incredible line to get into the rink. I don't usually think of ice-skating when it is 70 degrees, but obviously somebody does. To get in to the rink area patrons must pass through a metal detector. Are they looking of Osama? No. It appears they are trying to prevent gang fights.
Gang members ice skate?
I had planned to take a nap on Saturday. Instead, I spent the day in the park. I needed the sleep, but I enjoyed the entertainment even more.
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