Traveling Tips

If you are going to visit The Big City here are some tips:


Tip 1:

If the cab driver says there is no electricity in the part of the city you have asked to visit he is likely not talking about the relative nightlife. He may mean what he is saying literally.

Tip 2:

If someone comes up to you, a complete stranger, and begins a conversation, look him/her straight in the eye and say “no”.

Tip 3:

Avoid playing the game “name that smell”. It isn’t a very much fun and you don’t get anything if you win.

Tip 4:

Bring more than one wallet. In the wallet you plan to carry with you keep one or two credit cards and enough money for the day. In the other wallet keep everything else. Keep the second wallet at the hotel. If the room has a safe, use it. If it doesn’t have a safe leave it with the hotel front desk, which is required to have a safe.

Tip 5:

Remember to claim the second wallet from the front desk before you leave town.

Tip 6:

Check your hotel room thoroughly as you pack. For example, if you put your car keys in a dresser drawer and then get to the airport and find you don’t have your car keys, you will need to pay a cabby the going rate to bring them to you at the airport. (The going rate in New Orleans for this service is $28.00)

Tip 7:

Don’t put your car keys in a dresser drawer. Leave them in your luggage.

Tip 8:

Women: don’t wear white. Imagine you are on a boat returning from Ellis Island. Imagine also a thunderstorm is approaching. Imagine too that you are caught in the thunderstorm with nowhere to go for shelter.

As I was walking through Battery Park with friends, soaked to the skin from this sudden storm, I passed a couple, also soaked. As I passed the couple I could hear her say to her companion “can you see my ass?” She was wearing white shorts. At this I stopped, turned, gave her a thumbs up and said "You betcha. Nice purple thong. The men of New York City thank you.” Her response was “that will a dollar.”